I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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