My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
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