I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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