So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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