Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I think I sprained my soul last night
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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