Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Randomize