I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize
