Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I currently don't understand fingers.
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