remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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