Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
