I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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