I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Where did you get a picture of my penis
I want to have your abortion
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
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