dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
