Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
