You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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