It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize