if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize