Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
babies were throwing up all over the place
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
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