do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
