Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
