ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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