Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Randomize