i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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