The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
