our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Come see our sink grown plant.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
