Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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