Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
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