I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
