as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
