Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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