:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
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