I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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