she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize