Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
So much rum. So many feels.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Randomize
