You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
