I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
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