Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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