After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
