and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
