Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
vagina is talking i cant
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
