More tranny stories later!
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
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