So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
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