I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
