I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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