His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
3pm strippers are depressing
I feel like death gave me a hand job
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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