He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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