I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
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