ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
