if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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