It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
pray to the hookup gods
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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