Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize