I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
